Married or not… You should read this…

Married or not you should read this…
“When I got home that night as my wife
served dinner, I held her hand and said,
I’ve got something to tell you. She sat
down and ate quietly. Again I observed
the hurt in her eyes.
Suddenly I didn’t know how to open my
mouth. But I had to let her know what I
was thinking. I want a divorce. I raised
the topic calmly. She didn’t seem to be
annoyed by my words, instead she asked
me softly, why?
I avoided her question. This made her
angry. She threw away the chopsticks
and shouted at me, you are not a man!
That night, we didn’t talk to each other.
She was weeping. I knew she wanted to
find out what had happened to our
marriage. But I could hardly give her a
satisfactory answer; she had lost my
heart to Jane. I didn’t love her anymore. I
just pitied her!
With a deep sense of guilt, I drafted a
divorce agreement which stated that she
could own our house, our car, and 30%
stake of my company. She glanced at it
and then tore it into pieces. The woman
who had spent ten years of her life with
me had become a stranger. I felt sorry
for her wasted time, resources and
energy but I could not take back what I
had said for I loved Jane so dearly.
Finally she cried loudly in front of me,
which was what I had expected to see. To
me her cry was actually a kind of release.
The idea of divorce which had obsessed
me for several weeks seemed to be
firmer and clearer now.
The next day, I came back home very
late and found her writing something at
the table. I didn’t have supper but went
straight to sleep and fell asleep very fast
because I was tired after an eventful day
with Jane. When I woke up, she was still
there at the table writing. I just did not
care so I turned over and was asleep
again.
In the morning she presented her
divorce conditions: she didn’t want
anything from me, but needed a month’s
notice before the divorce. She requested
that in that one month we both struggle
to live as normal a life as possible. Her
reasons were simple: our son had his
exams in a month’s time and she didn’t
want to disrupt him with our broken
marriage.
This was agreeable to me. But she had
something more, she asked me to recall
how I had carried her into out bridal
room on our wedding day. She
requested that every day for the month’s
duration I carry her out of our bedroom
to the front door ever morning. I
thought she was going crazy. Just to
make our last days together bearable I
accepted her odd request.
I told Jane about my wife’s divorce
conditions. . She laughed loudly and
thought it was absurd. No matter what
tricks she applies, she has to face the
divorce, she said scornfully.
My wife and I hadn’t had any body
contact since my divorce intention was
explicitly expressed. So when I carried
her out on the first day, we both
appeared clumsy. Our son clapped
behind us, daddy is holding mommy in
his arms. His words brought me a sense
of pain. From the bedroom to the sitting
room, then to the door, I walked over
ten meters with her in my arms. She
closed her eyes and said softly; don’t tell
our son about the divorce. I nodded,
feeling somewhat upset. I put her down
outside the door. She went to wait for
the bus to work. I drove alone to the
office.
On the second day, both of us acted
much more easily. She leaned on my
chest. I could smell the fragrance of her
blouse. I realized that I hadn’t looked at
this woman carefully for a long time. I
realized she was not young any more.
There were fine wrinkles on her face, her
hair was graying! Our marriage had
taken its toll on her. For a minute I
wondered what I had done to her.
On the fourth day, when I lifted her up, I
felt a sense of intimacy returning. This
was the woman who had given ten years
of her life to me. On the fifth and sixth
day, I realized that our sense of intimacy
was growing again. I didn’t tell Jane
about this. It became easier to carry her
as the month slipped by. Perhaps the
everyday workout made me stronger.
She was choosing what to wear one
morning. She tried on quite a few
dresses but could not find a suitable one.
Then she sighed, all my dresses have
grown bigger. I suddenly realized that
she had grown so thin, that was the
reason why I could carry her more
easily.
Suddenly it hit me… she had buried so
much pain and bitterness in her heart.
Subconsciously I reached out and
touched her head.
Our son came in at the moment and
said, Dad, it’s time to carry mom out. To
him, seeing his father carrying his
mother out had become an essential
part of his life. My wife gestured to our
son to come closer and hugged him
tightly. I turned my face away because I
was afraid I might change my mind at
this last minute. I then held her in my
arms, walking from the bedroom,
through the sitting room, to the hallway.
Her hand surrounded my neck softly and
naturally. I held her body tightly; it was
just like our wedding day.
But her much lighter weight made me
sad. On the last day, when I held her in
my arms I could hardly move a step. Our
son had gone to school. I held her tightly
and said, I hadn’t noticed that our life
lacked intimacy. I drove to office….
jumped out of the car swiftly without
locking the door. I was afraid any delay
would make me change my mind…I
walked upstairs. Jane opened the door
and I said to her, Sorry, Jane, I do not
want the divorce anymore.
She looked at me, astonished, and then
touched my forehead. Do you have a
fever? She said. I moved her hand off my
head. Sorry, Jane, I said, I won’t divorce.
My marriage life was boring probably
because she and I didn’t value the details
of our lives, not because we didn’t love
each other anymore. Now I realize that
since I carried her into my home on our
wedding day I am supposed to hold her
until death do us apart. Jane seemed to
suddenly wake up. She gave me a loud
slap and then slammed the door and
burst into tears. I walked downstairs and
drove away. At the floral shop on the
way, I ordered a bouquet of flowers for
my wife. The salesgirl asked me what to
write on the card. I smiled and wrote, I’ll
carry you out every morning until death
do us apart.
That evening I arrived home, flowers in
my hands, a smile on my face, I run up
stairs, only to find my wife in the bed -
dead. My wife had been fighting CANCER
for months and I was so busy with Jane
to even notice. She knew that she would
die soon and she wanted to save me
from the whatever negative reaction
from our son, in case we push through
with the divorce.— At least, in the eyes of
our son—- I’m a loving husband….
The small details of your lives are what
really matter in a relationship. It is not
the mansion, the car, property, the
money in the bank. These create an
environment conducive for happiness
but cannot give happiness in themselves.
So find time to be your spouse’s friend
and do those little things for each other
that build intimacy. Do have a real happy
marriage!
If you don’t share this, nothing will
happen to you.
If you do, you just might save a
marriage. Many of life’s failures are
people who did not realize how close
they were to success when they gave up.

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3 thoughts on “Married or not… You should read this…

  1. Today, you hear about so many divorces… I’m a father to a 4 year old girl…

    Maybe that’s why this story has touched me so much that I decided to share it…. We tend to take everything for granted when you get too used to something or someone being there, but when it’s gone, you only realise what you’ve lost….

  2. Well you only need the light when it’s burning low
    Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
    Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    And you let her go
    Staring at the bottom of your glass
    Hoping one day you’ll make a dream last
    But dreams come slow and they go so fast
    You see her when you close your eyes
    Maybe one day you’ll understand why
    Everything you touch surely dies
    But you only need the light when it’s burning low
    Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
    Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    Staring at the ceiling in the dark
    Same old empty feeling in your heart
    ‘Cause love comes slow and it goes so fast
    Well you see her when you fall asleep
    But never to touch and never to keep
    ‘Cause you loved her too much
    And you dived too deep
    Well you only need the light when it’s burning low
    Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
    Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    And you let her go (oh, oh, ooh)
    And you let her go (oh, oh, ooh)
    Well you let her go
    ‘Cause you only need the light when it’s burning low
    Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
    Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    ‘Cause you only need the light when it’s burning low
    Only miss the sun when it starts to snow
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    Only know you’ve been high when you’re feeling low
    Only hate the road when you’re missin’ home
    Only know you love her when you let her go
    And you let her go

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